Have a sing-song of this parody of Christmas Pudding to the tune of Frère Jacques. It’ll be the gift that keeps on giving!
Christmas children, Christmas children,
Screaming lots! Screaming lots!
Confiscate the sugar, Confiscate the sugar,
Lose the plot! Lose the plot!
© Pass Me The Valium and passmethevalium.com, 2018.
What’s that wriggling in your poo?
Wipe and flush. Does your bum itch too?
Back to Boots now all of you
We’ve got worms in our bodies
And last night you slept in my room
So now my sheets need washing too
Every day we got infestations new
Got threadworms in our bodies
Oo-ah-oo-ah-oo-ah-oo-ah
We’ve got worms in our bodies
© Pass Me The Valium and passmethevalium.com, 2017.
[MANTAIN SANITY LEVELS NEXT TIME YOU’RE NIT-PICKING: SING THIS TO THE TUNE ‘SPICE UP YOUR LIFE’ BY THE SPICE GIRLS !]
When you’re feelin’ tired and slow
Kids can push your boundaries to new lows
Screamin’, shoutin’, loo covered in wee
One more thing saps positivity…
Children of the world
Lice up your life!
Every boy and every girl
Lice up you life!
Parents of the world
Lice up your life!
Arghhhhh!
Scratch it to the left
We’re not having a good time
Itch it to the right
Please tell me we’ve got wine?
Sit still to the front
Full Marks
Comb down!
Scratch it to the left
We’re not having a good time
Itch it to the right
Please tell me we’ve got wine?
Sit still to the front
Critters
I see ya!
Damn right!
La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la
La, la, la, la, la, la, la
Husband’s run to Timbuktu
Kids tonight it’s me and you
Kung Fu Panda
Frozen Queen
Ninja Turtle
And treats for bribery
Children of the world
Lice up your life!
Every boy and every girl
Lice up you life!
Parents of the world
Lice up your life!
Arghhhhh!
Scratch it to the left
We’re not having a good time
Itch it to the right
Please tell me we’ve got wine?
Sit still to the front
Full Marks
Comb down!
Scratch it to the left
We’re not having a good time
Itch it to the right
Please tell me we’ve got wine?
Sit still to the front
Critters
I see ya!
Damn right!
La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la
La, la, la, la, la, la, la
Prosecco
Lambrini
‘Cos treatment ain’t easy
We sweep through the long locks
Then stay bright and breezy
Scratch it, scratch it, scratch it
Head lice!
Scratch it, scratch it, scratch it
Head lice!
Eureka…
Scratch it to the left
We’re not having a good time
Itch it to the right
Please tell me we’ve got wine?
Sit still to the front
Full Marks
Comb down!
Scratch it to the left
We’re not having a good time
Itch it to the right
Please tell me we’ve got wine?
Sit still to the front
Nit free?
I see ya!
Damn right!
© Pass Me The Valium and passmethevalium.com, 2017.
Pass Me The Valium 